note to self: little notes and images from me to you.
she is . . .
the other you. the God Self you crave. the miracle worker. the one that opens you up and crawls into the centre of your chest.
rest in peace. i love you. i miss you aunty and. . .
the way you open the world up around you. the manner in which your mind worked. the way that you could find a whole person in one conversation. you had this mix of heart and mind that the world really didn't know how to handle. your wicked sense of humour. you didn't shy away from speaking up when need - that I really admired. a woman before her time in many ways. if I could say anything it would be that it's not your fault. I understand. I want the world to know how much you are loved. no one is the same without you. love X
beautiful Aotearoa and whanau
this photo was taken when I was really young. i think i was only 5 years old at the time. i sat with my aunty on the big grassy hill while the whanau fished for some kaimoana. when i look at the images i feel love. aroha was everywhere silent but everywhere. warm hands. warm food. a truth. a warm truth. even though Tangaroa was cold and Tawhiti was howling. aroha was everywhere. it was everywhere around me and them. i miss.
inner child magic is for you. . .
i wrote this for you and me. i wrote this piece for every hurt and magical child that hides in our shadow. the ones without mothers. the ones without fathers. the ones who have sick mothers. sick fathers. the ones who weren't built for wars. they were built for revolutions. I wrote this for you.
a photo sits on a cabinet at my mothers house. . .
you both probably too young to even understand the fire living within. my brother and my cousin. something. a place. a time. that I only heard about in conversations. you were both young i was no where to be seen or even thought of. when i came into the world into your world. i grew up. at different stages in my life i have relied on one of you or both of you. either for money. for food. for laughs. for truth. for wisdom. for understanding. thank you.
Papa and Mama the world that bought me into this world. . .
my mother being the first home I ever lived in. my father being the first man i loved. both of you i am created from. like two countries sitting beside each other. me being the border between you both. at times it has been war. at different times you both have exiled each other. you both find reconciliation at the border. you both fly white flags at the door. you both have been my greatest teachers. really. i haven't always spoken your language or understood your choices. but. love was never lost even when we all thought it had. love was always connecting us together. i love you both. a deep. deep. love for you both.
nan and pa
this photo looks really worn and ripped but its lived through many moves. the image was stuck with sticky tap with another few photo's in frame. you both mountains for us all. i know you have been watching us all and wondering what has happened? why? where? who? when? nan you fire is needed in these times. pa you patience is also needed. i know dad misses you both. i can feel you both on his chest. resting like two beautiful mountains.